The self that was there before the labels.
Gender, sexuality, race, culture, class, faith — you may be questioning one or holding several at once. This is a place to find out who you are without having to decide in advance who you are allowed to be.
- You are questioning your gender or sexuality and want to think it through with someone who has no stake in the answer.
- You are mixed, multiracial, adopted, or otherwise 'not quite' any of the boxes offered.
- You moved between classes — up or down — and belong fully to neither.
- You left, or are leaving, a faith or community that defined you.
- You have felt estranged, like you do not belong, for as long as you can remember.
Coastal sage grows back. Pave over it, plant something ornamental on top, and given the chance it returns, because it belongs to this ground. Identity is often like that: there is a self underneath what family, culture, faith, and fear planted over it, and it is still there.
I work with people exploring gender, sexuality, race, culture, class, and faith — often several at once, often after years of feeling like they belong nowhere. My intention is a space where you can uncover your authentic self without an agenda from me about what you will find. My approach is collaborative, direct, and warm; my curiosity is about the real you, not the version that keeps everyone comfortable.
Some people leave with a clearer name for themselves. Some leave with less need for a name at all. Both are good outcomes.
- Exploring identity without pressure to conclude, label, or announce.
- Coming out, or not — to family, at work, in communities where it is not safe.
- Intersections: being queer and Latinx, disabled and ambitious, religious and questioning.
- Shame absorbed from family or culture, and what is left when it is examined.
- Grief for communities and relationships that could not hold the real you.
- Building a life and relationships where you do not have to shrink.
There is nothing you need to know about yourself before you come. We start with where you are and what has felt unsettled. I use your name and pronouns as you give them, and I will ask before assuming anything about your family, faith, or culture.
Are you LGBTQ+ affirming?
Yes. I welcome people of all identities, and I am particularly committed to those who have felt estranged or that they do not belong. I do not practice or endorse any form of conversion therapy. Your identity is not a problem to be solved; the distress around it is what we work on.
I'm not sure what I'm questioning. Is that okay?
That is often exactly the right time to begin. Exploration does not require a hypothesis. Many people arrive with a vague sense that something does not fit, and we work from there.
Do you work with adolescents on identity?
Yes — I work with adolescents and adults. For minors, we discuss confidentiality and what parents will and will not be told at the very start, together.